HISTORY ON THURSDAYS WITH COLLYBRIGHT
5 TRADITIONAL
MARRIAGES IN NIGERIA
Saturdays are
for ‘owanbes.’
Nigeria, no doubt
we are beautiful people with beautiful culture and traditions. From our level
of creativity, to hustling lifestyle. And of course we can’t leave behind the
fact that we are the happiest nation in the world!
Considering the
diversity in culture and tradition of various ethnic groups in the country,
marriage is considered the most celebrated achievement of a Nigerian ranging
from its months of adequate preparation, a big deal especially when it involves
two different ethnic groups. One thing about Nigerian custom marriage is that,
if you are yet to marry, when you attend one of either a friend’s or family’s,
you will so much feel like getting married at that very instance.
It is easier to
marry from one’s tribe because the marriage procedures are familiar. But once
you are going outside your tribe to get married, just remember that ‘culture
adaptability is your watchword’, as other tribes and ethnic group culture and
traditions might seem strange and sometimes even scary!
Irrespective of how
distinctive our customs, traditions, culture and beliefs are, that wouldn’t put
off that four letter words that breaks all barrier, break all protocols,
against all odds, LOVE!
Biblically, it is
not good for a man to be alone, traditionally; it is not acceptable for a woman
to grow old in her parent’s house.
Few days ago, I was
having a chit-chat with a colleague of mine about getting married to an Igbo
girl, she happened to be from the East, so she was like, “My guy, if you no get
correct money, no even think am” (meaning, if you are not rich, don’t even
think of marrying an Igbo girl). Well there are some Nigerian marriage customs
that can put off prospective grooms or make him have deep second thought.
Some of these
practices have been in practice for decades and are prerequisite for marrying
daughters from that tribe some even up till date.
The Fulani Sharo Tradition
The Fulani ethnic
group, found in the northern region of Nigeria, is one of the dominant ethnic
groups in Nigeria alongside the Yoruba, Hausa and Igbo groups. The Fulani
people have rich and peculiar cultures and traditions which guides their
everyday life. Sharo (which means flogging) festival, is one where young Fulani
boys test their strength and endurance by getting flogged. According to this
tradition, the groom is made to undergo a rigorous act of bravery before he is
able to wed a Fulani lady. This tradition entails flogging the potential groom publicly
just before his nuptials. The belief is that, it puts the man on the verge of
becoming a real man, and with the total conviction that he can cater for their
daughter in terms of strength, endurance, and resilience, as the nomadic Fulani
are one group known for their hard work, courage and discipline.
So, if you are
planning to get married to that Fulani babe, go back to that your secondary
school mathematics teacher to flog you for free for practice, you cry, you out!
Lolzzz
The Yoruba Traditional Wedding Act of Prostrating!
“Sho mo
age mi?”
I’m sure you’re
smiling right now. That particular line simply denotes that very distinct
significance to the Yorubas. Respect is an integral and germane part of its
culture and tradition. Allow me to say this, a typical Yoruba man can give you
a pot of porridge meant for him if and only if you just give him that needed
respect. It makes their head to swell like garri-ijebu. So as part of this, the
Yoruba tribe is synonymous to prostrating and this goes out to every intending
groom of a Yoruba girl.
The groom and his
friends and family will have to bow to the bride’s family, lay flat on the
floor whether or not you are wearing gold or the floor is dirty. You cannot
escape this tradition! And while doing this, you are not, nor any of those
joining you to prostrate to put on English dress. This practice involves your
chest touching the ground flat and your entire body like a fallen mango tree.
This prostration process according to tradition is done 21 times, as it is
fondly called 21-Idobales, by the groom before the end of the marriage
ceremony.
The Self-care Portal Before Marriage
This is one
phenomenal thing about the Yoruba traditional marriage, though its less
pronounced now compared to the olden days. Lest I forget, the self-care portal
I know many of you will be wondering what I mean by that is actually the female
virginity. The virginity test is an ancient Yoruba tradition that has been a
controversial marriage rite for many years now. It occurs at the wedding eve
popularly called the honeymoon where it is expected that the groom will bring
out a white cloth stained with blood, after consummating the marriage to prove
that the bride is a virgin and has kept herself pure. If the bride is a virgin,
the groom sends gifts to her family. If she isn’t, a half-boiled/roasted yam is
sent to her family. Well, we all know we are in the 21st century, if you are
still living in that world, my brother; you are on a long thing!
The Igbotic Bank Balance Marriage Custom
Trust me; these
guys have got one of the best forms of customs and traditions. The notion built
around the Igbos is absolutely true. 1. Ego is all that matters as they take up
businesses of different shapes and sizes just to have their pocket breathing
heavily. 2. A typical family man who has many daughters is a potential
rich-man! As it's widely believed that they ‘sell’ their daughters out. This is
one of the Nigerian customs that has over the years raised a lot of debate and
has affected a lot of potential suitors from marrying the person they love.
Well, it’s not only the Igbos that is known for this, the Rivers’ likewise are
known for having expensive marriage. The Igbo tribe has a peculiar expensive
marriage procedure where a list of items must be presented before the marriage
can take place. To worsen the situation, if the girl happens to be a degree holder,
BSc, be ready to spend, MSc? You are not meant to be an average class, PhD? My
brother, which oil company are you working, please??... Some time ago I was
fortunate to stumble on the list for the traditional marriage rite called bride
price, and I was left dumbfounded! Overtime, this expensive marriage rite has
led to the collapse of many relationships and courtships due to the inability
of potential suitors to meet up with the demands of the marriage rites.
Ijaw traditional wedding
This particular
custom of marriage is known with the Ijaw people who are also known as the Ijo
or Ïzon) are a group of people indigenous to the Niger Delta in the African
country of Nigeria. They also come specifically from the forested areas of the
Bayelsa, Delta and Rivers States. The Ijaws have got beautiful attire when it
comes to their traditional wedding.
Now, talking about
the “no-smiling” face of the bride, it is expected that the bride come out
giving a stern face, frowning. Traditionally, the suitors are lined up to be
spraying the bride with money, it’s the man that sprays the largest amount of
money to her satisfaction is whom she will smile with, and that depicts, she
has chosen that particular person as her husband. This tradition is still in
play, but the difference is that, it’s not of competition. But the bride will
not smile, rather be frowning, until her husband stands up to spray her money
after everybody must have done theirs.
Well to my own best
of understanding, this to me means that, the man is meant to be rich in order
to make his wife happy, as money brings smiles to the face.
After all said and
done, you would agree with me that, Nigerian custom for marriage is one that
touches all aspects of life ranging from ability to physically protect your
family to providing for your family adequately financially, and also morally!
It's no matter how
diverse the culture could be, acculturation, adaptability, and keen
understanding is all that matters.
Source: Mccollybright.blogspot.com.ng
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