HISTORY ON THURSDAYS WITH COLLYBRIGHT



5 TRADITIONAL MARRIAGES IN NIGERIA

Saturdays are for  ‘owanbes.’
Nigeria, no doubt we are beautiful people with beautiful culture and traditions. From our level of creativity, to hustling lifestyle. And of course we can’t leave behind the fact that we are the happiest nation in the world!
Considering the diversity in culture and tradition of various ethnic groups in the country, marriage is considered the most celebrated achievement of a Nigerian ranging from its months of adequate preparation, a big deal especially when it involves two different ethnic groups. One thing about Nigerian custom marriage is that, if you are yet to marry, when you attend one of either a friend’s or family’s, you will so much feel like getting married at that very instance.
It is easier to marry from one’s tribe because the marriage procedures are familiar. But once you are going outside your tribe to get married, just remember that ‘culture adaptability is your watchword’, as other tribes and ethnic group culture and traditions might seem strange and sometimes even scary!
Irrespective of how distinctive our customs, traditions, culture and beliefs are, that wouldn’t put off that four letter words that breaks all barrier, break all protocols, against all odds, LOVE!
Biblically, it is not good for a man to be alone, traditionally; it is not acceptable for a woman to grow old in her parent’s house.
Few days ago, I was having a chit-chat with a colleague of mine about getting married to an Igbo girl, she happened to be from the East, so she was like, “My guy, if you no get correct money, no even think am” (meaning, if you are not rich, don’t even think of marrying an Igbo girl). Well there are some Nigerian marriage customs that can put off prospective grooms or make him have deep second thought.

Some of these practices have been in practice for decades and are prerequisite for marrying daughters from that tribe some even up till date.


The Fulani Sharo Tradition


The Fulani ethnic group, found in the northern region of Nigeria, is one of the dominant ethnic groups in Nigeria alongside the Yoruba, Hausa and Igbo groups. The Fulani people have rich and peculiar cultures and traditions which guides their everyday life. Sharo (which means flogging) festival, is one where young Fulani boys test their strength and endurance by getting flogged. According to this tradition, the groom is made to undergo a rigorous act of bravery before he is able to wed a Fulani lady. This tradition entails flogging the potential groom publicly just before his nuptials. The belief is that, it puts the man on the verge of becoming a real man, and with the total conviction that he can cater for their daughter in terms of strength, endurance, and resilience, as the nomadic Fulani are one group known for their hard work, courage and discipline.
So, if you are planning to get married to that Fulani babe, go back to that your secondary school mathematics teacher to flog you for free for practice, you cry, you out! Lolzzz

The Yoruba Traditional Wedding Act of Prostrating!

 “Sho mo age mi?”
I’m sure you’re smiling right now. That particular line simply denotes that very distinct significance to the Yorubas. Respect is an integral and germane part of its culture and tradition. Allow me to say this, a typical Yoruba man can give you a pot of porridge meant for him if and only if you just give him that needed respect. It makes their head to swell like garri-ijebu. So as part of this, the Yoruba tribe is synonymous to prostrating and this goes out to every intending groom of a Yoruba girl.

The groom and his friends and family will have to bow to the bride’s family, lay flat on the floor whether or not you are wearing gold or the floor is dirty. You cannot escape this tradition! And while doing this, you are not, nor any of those joining you to prostrate to put on English dress. This practice involves your chest touching the ground flat and your entire body like a fallen mango tree. This prostration process according to tradition is done 21 times, as it is fondly called 21-Idobales, by the groom before the end of the marriage ceremony.

The Self-care Portal Before Marriage

This is one phenomenal thing about the Yoruba traditional marriage, though its less pronounced now compared to the olden days. Lest I forget, the self-care portal I know many of you will be wondering what I mean by that is actually the female virginity. The virginity test is an ancient Yoruba tradition that has been a controversial marriage rite for many years now. It occurs at the wedding eve popularly called the honeymoon where it is expected that the groom will bring out a white cloth stained with blood, after consummating the marriage to prove that the bride is a virgin and has kept herself pure. If the bride is a virgin, the groom sends gifts to her family. If she isn’t, a half-boiled/roasted yam is sent to her family. Well, we all know we are in the 21st century, if you are still living in that world, my brother; you are on a long thing!

The Igbotic Bank Balance Marriage Custom

Trust me; these guys have got one of the best forms of customs and traditions. The notion built around the Igbos is absolutely true. 1. Ego is all that matters as they take up businesses of different shapes and sizes just to have their pocket breathing heavily. 2. A typical family man who has many daughters is a potential rich-man! As it's widely believed that they ‘sell’ their daughters out. This is one of the Nigerian customs that has over the years raised a lot of debate and has affected a lot of potential suitors from marrying the person they love. Well, it’s not only the Igbos that is known for this, the Rivers’ likewise are known for having expensive marriage. The Igbo tribe has a peculiar expensive marriage procedure where a list of items must be presented before the marriage can take place. To worsen the situation, if the girl happens to be a degree holder, BSc, be ready to spend, MSc? You are not meant to be an average class, PhD? My brother, which oil company are you working, please??... Some time ago I was fortunate to stumble on the list for the traditional marriage rite called bride price, and I was left dumbfounded! Overtime, this expensive marriage rite has led to the collapse of many relationships and courtships due to the inability of potential suitors to meet up with the demands of the marriage rites.

Ijaw traditional wedding

This particular custom of marriage is known with the Ijaw people who are also known as the Ijo or Ïzon) are a group of people indigenous to the Niger Delta in the African country of Nigeria. They also come specifically from the forested areas of the Bayelsa, Delta and Rivers States. The Ijaws have got beautiful attire when it comes to their traditional wedding.
Now, talking about the “no-smiling” face of the bride, it is expected that the bride come out giving a stern face, frowning. Traditionally, the suitors are lined up to be spraying the bride with money, it’s the man that sprays the largest amount of money to her satisfaction is whom she will smile with, and that depicts, she has chosen that particular person as her husband. This tradition is still in play, but the difference is that, it’s not of competition. But the bride will not smile, rather be frowning, until her husband stands up to spray her money after everybody must have done theirs.
Well to my own best of understanding, this to me means that, the man is meant to be rich in order to make his wife happy, as money brings smiles to the face.
After all said and done, you would agree with me that, Nigerian custom for marriage is one that touches all aspects of life ranging from ability to physically protect your family to providing for your family adequately financially, and also morally!

It's no matter how diverse the culture could be, acculturation, adaptability, and keen understanding is all that matters.


Source: Mccollybright.blogspot.com.ng

About The Author: Adeshile Adekolajo

Adeshile Adekolajo is a graduate from the University of Abuja, He works for Ntel Nigeria and we owns - Mccollybright.blogspot.com

He is a writer, blogger and poet, to read more of his interesting and educative articles, please log on to - mccollybright.blogspot.com.ng



                                                            

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