Someone Call The Police, I Know Where The Snake Is Hiding.

So, you saw the title and you were immediately interested in what I have to say abi? Na so dem dey ask pesin o but before I continue; 'wait! is it your title?' Moving swiftly on, I saw an headline about a mystery snake swallowing NGN36,000,000.00 in Jamb office earlier in the month and I could not believe my eyes o. 'How can a snake swallow Thirty-Six Million Naira?' I could not make any sense of it.

I wanted to ignore the story but during the course of last week, Social Media was overwhelmed with different pictures, videos and other animations inspired by the wonder snake and the Federal Government through the Ministry of Snake Affairs (MSA) have promised to compensation anybody that blows the whistle on the whereabouts of the wonder snake. I am sure someone somewhere is surprised, Yeah, the information is not for public consumption o, The Director-General of Snake Theft Prevention Agency (STPA) called me personally ni o. He does not want anybody to know o, I am only sharing this information with you guys because you are my readers and you guys mean a lot to me ni o. No be my mouth you hear am o. Oh sorry, no be my blog you read ni o. Abeg, I no wan wahala o.

Consequently, you know I am a sharp guy nao, I resigned last week so that I can dedicate all my time and efforts to the search and get my reward o. 'How much be my salary sef?' I thought as I signed my resignation letter. 'Guess what, friends?' the MD have been calling me back to resume work but I am still in Benue State, I need to get to the bottom of this. I am a patriotic Nigerian and I totally condemn any snake that wants to put my country to shame. "No snake fashioned against my country will escape without giving me my cut". God forbid!

Okay, before I continue with this epic and interesting story, last week was valentine and I got a cake for my people 'in the ause' and some people have been complaining o. 'Is it your house? Okay, is it your cake? Abi, is it your Oluwole? I don tire sef! Is it your icing sugar?' Please help me ask these haters o. Valentine is the season of love and love is best shared among family members and loved ones.

Similarly, I saw an article on Yammer about Friendship and how it can lift the spirit and bring about great results. I was inspired by that masterpiece and I would like to acknowledge a friend and close confident who has always been there for me through the tick and thin. She is a wonderful person. I was downcast-ed when she told me she would be relocating to South Africa at the end of the month. I remember vividly that I was emotionally broken when we met. I was going through a break-up, I was suffocating and I seriously needed help when God sent her into my life. She is a sister and a friend, she is passionate about my articles and she is the only person that follows my blog. She is a generous person - Yeah, she gives without expecting anything in return. 'Pause! no be that kin give o, ur mind dauti sha'. I always 'escape' to her office anytime I need a break from work and she is always there to lend a helping hand. You are a great friend. I will miss you so much. God bless you Folake.
So, you still want to know where the Snake is abi? See your head, Olodo #FebruaryFool.

God Bless Us All as we continue the frantic search for the wonder snake.

Olusanya, Oluwole Sheriff